October 10, 1918. Blackwell Hospital for Criminal Insane
DEAR MISS FRANCO,
I’ve been thinking about time again recently. Thinking slightly differently. A seed of a thought has germinated and I can’t shake it. Every time I or anyone else mentions anything about the future or past, which is more often than I realised, this thought pings in the forefront of my mind. The thought of time not existing. How time is a concept that we’ve made fit our assumptions about the universe. I did think about the past as a trail behind me, the things I did happened a long time ago and that in time things change. But now… This is hard to make sense of. Possibly because it makes no sense… Now, I’m thinking of how things are just moving. Not having a past self like snapshots in time but just vibrating and moving in a continuum. Now has become just a current configuration of things. Maybe this is exactly the same thing, just another way of looking at it, or maybe this is just nonsense. I just can’t stop thinking about it.
10th October at 10 o’clock pm
The sequence of events are no longer important. The current configuration of understanding is all that matters. The movement of things from a different place to this place. This ever shifting of things.
‘Frozen in time’ the convergence of time and movement. From is always a place, never a time.
I’ve been taking… Actually, let’s leave it there for now. I have an incredible pain in my abdomen and my mind is not my own.